This month the prompt consists of the line: "It's okay. You don't have to love me." I wasn't really sure what to do with it, but I finally came up with an idea. It's not very long, but I hope you like it.
“Then he
said, ‘It’s okay. You don’t have to love me.’ My first thought was, you’re damn
straight, there, buck wheat.”
Dana burst
out laughing, almost shooting Pepsi out her nose. “You didn’t say that, did
you?”
Her best
friend, Gina, rolled her eyes. “No, of course not. I said, ‘That’s good,
because I don’t.’”
“Well, yeah,
you’ve only been dating…what? Two weeks?”
“If that, so
I am definitely not in love with him.”
Dana shook
her head. “So, he thinks he’s in love with you?”
“Hell no,”
Gina said, “he just wants in my pants. Because after he delivered his line
worthy of a B-grade film he said, ‘Just let me love you.’ Then he grabbed one
of my tits.”
Dana really
tried not to laugh, she really did, but just couldn’t help it. Her best friend
ended up in the most bizarre situations with the most bizarre men. There’d been
the guy who claimed he was an actor, which he wasn’t. He was an usher at the
theatre. Another guy said he was an award-winning song writer and told Gina he’d
written songs like Ed Sheeran’s Shape of You, but that the singer had stolen
it. And, on and on. Dana really couldn’t remember the last normal guy Gina had
dated.
“And then
what happened?” Dana couldn’t stop herself from asking.
“Oh, he
dropped his pants and revealed he wasn’t wearing underwear. What he did have
was a tattoo that said love machine right above his dick.”
“You can’t
make this shit up.”
Gina smiled.
“Oh, hell no, I don’t have this good of an imagination.”
“So, what
did you do?”
“I slapped
his hand off my tit, grabbed my purse and left. He tried to run after me, but,
instead, tripped over his pants and fell out into the main hall of his
apartment building. The elderly lady who lives across the hall came out then
and screamed since he was naked. I didn’t stay around to find out what happened
then.”
“I’m so
sorry, but this stuff only happens to you.”
“I know and
this is why I’m taking a break from dating. Hopefully, if I give it a few
months the weirdos will have all found other people and I can find somebody, at
least, half way normal.”
“Okay, that’s
not what I expected to hear. You once told me that if you didn’t have a date
for the weekend you’d shrivel up and waste away.”
“Obviously,
I’m stupid. And, if I would waste away it’d be preferable to the men I’ve been
seeing.”
Dana shook
her head. “That’s just it. You’re not dating men, you’re dating boys. Maybe you
need to start looking somewhere other than the bars and clubs for guys to date.”
Gina smiled.
“You’re brilliant. I’ll join an online dating site.”
Jumping up,
she raced out of the room before Dana had a chance to respond. Sitting back in
her chair, she knew, without a doubt, there were more weirdos in Gina’s future.
With the internet, the pool was going to be wider and deeper. Dana didn’t know
whether to be afraid or excited at the prospect of even more entertainment.
Bwahahahahaha! Oh yeah, internet is SO much better. /sarcasm. Great flash, Gwen. :D
ReplyDeleteIt's Kris. Well done. I really enjoyed this. And I so feel for Gina.
ReplyDelete*grinning from ear to ear* Thank you! Not scary. Not sad. Not bittersweet. Just a good laugh. Guys really can be that ridiculous though, and girls that dump. Really? The internet? :P Good job!
ReplyDelete