Wednesday, January 27, 2016


Hello! Before I get out my soapbox to mouth off about my pet peeves, here's WMH

*sigh* Anyway, pet peeves of the writing variety. I don't know that I have many, but here we go.

1. Not writing when I say I will. Yeah, that's a big one with me. And with depression it's even bigger . . . huger even. Often, by the time I do all my adult stuff and make it home, I just really want to nap. Depression is exhausting and pretending everything is okay is even more exhausting. So, yeah, no writing.

2. Getting half way or more through a book and realizing--whoops-- the beginning of it is wrong. Yeah, that's another thing I'm facing right now. So, with over 50k I am back at the beginning fixing it so that the story will make sense.

3. When I'm actually writing having to stop for one reason or another. Once that happens, I'm sunk.

4. Having an awesome idea for a book . . . but I'm already working on one and have 2 others I have to get to before I can get to the new great idea.

5. Seeing brand new books out I want to read, but know I should be writing instead. But really wanting to read the books . . . for research and stuff. 

Right now, that's all I got. If you have some awesome pet peeves . . . any pet peeves you want to share then drop them down in the comments. I want to know what bothers you. Truly.

Now, don't forget to run and check out what bugs the other bloggers and I'll see you all next week.-- Gwen

Jessica D

Wednesday, January 20, 2016


As you know, I can never do one of these pic deals without adding words. So there you go. Anyway, there were no real direction for this so I'm just going to show pics of things, places, people that make me happy.And the first happy is Wednesday Male Hotness

And now, run over and check out what makes the other bloggers happy. I will see you all next week! -- Gwen

Jessica D

Wednesday, January 6, 2016


Before I jump in let me share Wednesday Male Hotness:

Okay, so our topic this week is all about last year. A year, truthfully, I'd rather forget. In fact, I was going to blow this blog off or do something silly, but I think instead I'll be totally, absolutely honest. I know . . . scary. 

To begin, I have a mental illness . . . probably more than one, but whatever. I have clinical depression. I take meds, but often they don't work because the illness overwhelms them. Because life and my reactions to events overwhelms them. I think of it as a low grade fire that constantly has water sprayed on it. The water controls it, but never puts it out. Sometimes the flames flare up and that tiny spurt of water just isn't enough. 

2015 started out horrible. I lost my two baby boy cats, Warlock and Max within a week of each other. Devastating. I don't think I quite recovered from the one two punch of that. Those events tossed gasoline on my tiny flame. Things just kept rolling, adding fuel to the flame. 

The depression overwhelmed, as it's wont to do, and before I knew it I was under. I couldn't write, didn't want to go anywhere, didn't want to do anything, slept constantly or not at all. Suicide entered my mind. Been there, had those thoughts before, and I'm savvy enough not to fall for them. But it was so tempting. End it. Over.

Guess what? I didn't. I knew it was the illness whispering. Even at my very worse, when I imagined there was no one who would care if I disappeared, I knew my sister would. I couldn't leave my sister. No matter what. I couldn't, wouldn't do that to her. Was it and is it a struggle? Oh hell yes. But making the choice to die would be like tossing my Mom's gift back in her face. 

See, my Mom had a massive stroke and ended up in Hosparus (hospice hospital). I knew she was hanging on for us. She always said she'd never leave her girls. I told her it was okay to go. We knew she loved us. But, we'd be fine, because she gifted me with my best friend. Since she'd worked so hard to give that gift to me, how would it be if I tossed it away? 

I think I'm on the upswing. At least, I feel as though I am, but I take it one day at a time. Sometimes, when things get really shitty, I focus on an event or a trip we have planned. You know, can't go anywhere cause I don't want to miss (insert thing here). It works for me and, yeah, sometimes that's all that matters.

Saying all this, there have been "best" memories from this year. I got a kitten, Maeve, who is so sweet. She really is my baby.

Sis & I went to Nashville a few times to meet our best friends and hang out. 

We also took a trip to Atlanta, which was a lot of fun. We saw the largest aquarium in the universe, the botanical garden, and the natural history museum. 

We planted our flower garden. We went to tea at our favorite place, Sisters Tea Parlor. 

Our best friends came and spent the holidays with us. 

I even picked up a new hobby, which is making my own soap. Go me. 

It's so easy to dwell on the bad, especially when depression is flamed up to forest fire levels. This post though, has forced me to list the good stuff from this year and that's a huge positive. Like I said, I wasn't even going to do this post, but blogging every week was one of my resolutions for the year. 

Hope this wasn't a downer to you. And if you suffer from depression it's okay, it's an illness just like high blood pressure or diabetes. Make sure you take care of yourself and if it gets too much please, please seek help. Know that you are so valuable, you are the only you here and we'd miss if you you were gone. 

Now go and check out some other best memories from the other bloggers and I'll see you next week. Pinkie Promise! Gwen

Jessica D

Monday, January 4, 2016


“Stop! Stop! Stop!”
The voice, and the splattering of water, yanked Kara out of the spell she’d been attempting. Opening her eyes, she found herself slightly damp while the woods around her dripped with water. Huffing out a breath, she turned on the old man by her side.
“Why did you do that?” she demanded.
“Why were you trying to set the woods on fire?” he asked, lowering his bushy brows over his dark eyes. “There are living beings here that need their home.”
“I wasn’t setting a fire,” she explained. “I was opening a portal.”
“No,” he said, shaking his head, “you were setting the tree on fire.”
She turned back and looked at the scene in front of her. The trees, on either side of the small path in front of her, were a bit charred. Hell, why wasn’t this working? Most people could open a portal without any effort, but she couldn’t. She could do other things, bigger things, more dangerous things without any effort at all, but the portal eluded her.
“I wasn’t trying to start a fire,” she said, turning back to her grandfather.
“Well you were.”
“You know, you should be more supportive,” she said. “Gram said you should pick less and support more.”
“Yes, but you weren’t burning down your Gram’s house were you?” he said, reasonably.
She pinched the bridge of her nose. He was right. Of course he was right. He was always right and that’s why it sucked so much. As much as he worked with her, trained her, opening a portal was something she couldn’t do.
“Kara,” he said, “I understand your frustration. But setting a fire is no way to deal.”
Against her will, she laughed. “I wasn’t trying to start a fire, you old goat. I was trying to open a portal. As if you didn’t know.”
He grandfather smiled. “I kind of figured that out. Come over here.”
He took her arm and led her to a fallen log. Sitting, he pulled her down next to him. He didn’t say anything, but then she was used to that. No one hurried her grandfather, least of all her. He would speak when he was ready. Until then, she breathed deep and soaked in the serenity of the forest. Sunlight filtered through the high canopy causing sparkles of light to dance here and there as the wind blew. She’d grown up playing and learning in this magical place. Never, ever, did she want to leave.
“I think you are putting too much effort into your magic.”
“What?” she turned to stare at the man next to her.
He pulled contemplatively at his beard as his soft grey eyes watched her behind wire-rimmed lenses. “You are so powerful. I think your power is overwhelming the spell causing it to fail. I’ve been thinking on this for quite a while. Small children can open a portal, but not you, because your power has never been small. It’s always been more mature.”
“So I should…throttle back?”
“Yes, exactly. Your magic should nudge, not push and shove.”
Rising, she moved to stand in the middle of the small deer path. Small, she told herself, gentle. The magic welled up inside her and Kara took a small, gentle tendril and allowed it to flow out into the space before her. She pictured a doorway forming in her mind and saw her grandmother’s kitchen garden. This was where she wanted the portal to take her. Home. Nowhere fabulous. Just home.
She opened her eyes to find a bright shining doorway hovering right above the path. No fire, this time, but a true portal. Without looking away, she gave her grandfather a thumb’s up.
“Oh my gosh, it’s beautiful.”
She longed to do a jig, but didn’t dare. Not yet anyway. Once back home she’d do a victory lap around the garden with her grandmother’s pet goat, Sissy. Right now, she concentrated on keeping her magic in check.
“Wish me luck,” she said. “I’ll see you at home.”

Smiling, she stepped into the bright sphere.

Hope you enjoyed it. Now run over and check out how the other bloggers handled the picture.